No matter what age they are, people who have lost both of their parents in death often say that they “feel like an orphan.” Even though they had (and still have) parents, they say that they can’t help but feel orphaned when their parents have passed away.
I believe that ‘Home’ had orphaned me like that. Or so I felt when I was ten years old. That was the age that I was when our family moved cities for the first time, and it was the last age that I remember feeling that I lived in a home, rather than just a house. I can’t put my finger on it, the reason why home got lost, and I won’t point one either. All I know is that for me, home was a runaway.
Two moves later, I was fifteen and following a fight with my parents, I left home. I wasn’t at all enlightened at that age, and I don’t know if I was running away from home or running in search of it. For eighteen years I moved from apartment to apartment, house to house, boyfriend to boyfriend, infatuation to heartbreak, and paycheck to paycheck. Until at last I set out to create ‘Home’ inside myself.
It was the pursuit of my purpose that finally gave me comfort and unorphaned me from a home that I had chased before I had the slightest idea what I really needed. Today, home has taken on a completely new meaning for me. Home is the real me, the enlightened space inside my being, the welcome mat of my soul.
And, since I made the decision to commit my life in partnership with another human being through marriage—yeah, there was a time when spotting Bigfoot was more likely, nonetheless—home is once again a place of sorts, though still portable and intangible. While we too have moved numerous times, home is the space where we are, our little family of three, the family that our love built: my husband, Burt; my cat of 22 years, Sabrina; and me.
That’s how it is with love. Home is not a building, any longer; it’s what you build. Home is where your heart is. This can be your mantra too. It’s freeing, when you decide that your home, your happiness, and your love, are not under roof or under another’s control. You build them with each decision, with every action. The magic of viral energy is that you have a supernatural creation power at your will: Light energy and dark energy are catchy. Discover your life’s true purpose. Don’t dwell on negativity or get stuck in doubt. Choose all that is good and light—get around it, marinade in it, and create your dwelling place.